My daughter is getting picked on at school

[barbiedoll1973_tn]

Ok today I get this call from the school my daughter went to see the councelor and told her that this stupid girl has been picking on her she pushed her up against the wall and called her names.. so I told them that I want soemthing done that this had to stop....
I don't really know what else to do my daughter is 16 years old and you know how they get at that age.
My daugher she is small and the other girl is tall alot bigger than her so I am affraid for them to fight...
My husband thought that she should go up to the girl and just knock her head off and that will end all of this...
He thinks that I have done the wrong thing by reporting this to the principle...

What would you do if this was your daughter?
I feel like going over there and knocking her head off myself BUT can't do that..

[CopyCat]

Ok Cindy I'll try and help... I would say first off don't get all wide eyed and emotional...
Well I'm probably to late for that one... I think you did right by telling the principal,
but you will want to ask just what steps the school plans to take to stop this...
Make sure there going to get the ball rolling on this... Ok now you need to listen
to your daughter very carefully as she describes how this bullying episode played
out... Your going to have to try and read between the lines here because most
kids won't tell you the whole story... And do not criticize or blame her, but often
times kids are picked on for there lack of social skills, or for being over talkative
about something the bully did, or said, or something... But if you can pin point
what started this, it could help... You will need to talk about what she will need
to do if this happens again... Don't ask me because I don't know the specifics of this...
By no means do you want to contact the bully’s parents, let the school do that...
Its there job, hopefully they have procedures that they follow for this kinda situation...
Thats about all I got, oh I'd say to concentrate on finding a solution to this problem
and not on punishing the bully... That could really back fire on you and make things
worst for your daughter than they already are... I do hope that maybe
some small part of this might help you...

[barbiedoll1973_tn]

Originally Posted by CopyCat

Ok Cindy I'll try and help... I would say first off don't get all wide eyed and emotional...
Well I'm probably to late for that one... I think you did right by telling the principal,
but you will want to ask just what steps the school plans to take to stop this...
Make sure there going to get the ball rolling on this... Ok now you need to listen
to your daughter very carefully as she describes how this bullying episode played
out... Your going to have to try and read between the lines here because most
kids won't tell you the whole story... And do not criticize or blame her, but often
times kids are picked on for there lack of social skills, or for being over talkative
about something the bully did, or said, or something... But if you can pin point
what started this, it could help... You will need to talk about what she will need
to do if this happens again... Don't ask me because I don't know the specifics of this...
By no means do you want to contact the bully’s parents, let the school do that...
Its there job, hopefully they have procedures that they follow for this kinda situation...
Thats about all I got, oh I'd say to concentrate on finding a solution to this problem
and not on punishing the bully... That could really back fire on you and make things
worst for your daughter than they already are... I do hope that maybe
some small part of this might help you...

Thanks for your advice its a huge help.
Today was a good day for my daughter she was not picked on at all, but today was a half day so Monday may be a different story...

[fidget]

Oh, what a pain. I think you did right contacting the principal. They are 16, and you don't want to teach her that she has to fight someone to get herself out of the position of victim. Really, the best thing, however hard, is to ignore the bully as much as possible AND keep reporting any incidents to the principal. The squeeky wheel, you know! You need to find ways to empower your daughter so she will not seem a victim, you don't want to teach her to "roll over and take it", but you also don't want to teach her to stoop to the bully's level. Good luck... I'm scared for when my kids become teens!

[snookumsnort]

Well, you did the right thing of reporting it to the principal. I was surprised though that at 16 there are children still physically bullying others. If you're pretty certain that your daughter didn't do anything to antagonize the bully, I would tell her to stay away, be happy with who she is, and tell her that it's the reality of life that there are losers everywhere who pick on others for no reason at all.

[Kimberly]

U should tell your daughter 2 hangout in safe places at school until this blows over. There are places in any school that your little girl will not have to worry about a bully. Lunch rooms, study hall, the library are all safe places.

[barbiedoll1973_tn]

Thanks everyone for all the help.
So far the bully girl has not bothered my daughter anymore so maybe its all over with or at least I hope so, But so far so good I will keep everyone updated on this.

[xertsl]

phew thats lucky i couldnt think of a solution

right so resolving the problems in the middle east


EUREKA !!


oh wait no that'll make it worse

[barbiedoll1973_tn]

So far so good guys,
My daughter has not complained anymore of that bully picking on her.. Thank goodness...
So maybe this will not happen again. I hope not...

[AbigailD]

I am glad that there has been nothing more since. I think that 16 has to be just about the hardest age of all to deal with bullying because you never know what is appropriate and what will seem like interference to the child.

I think you did well, and I hope she's ok!